The hardest challenge of my life...

NOTE:  Though this may be a bit long I am opening a window of my present not yet shared...

In the late 1980's I had the honor of being asked by a team of doctors to become one of their patients for what was then the first Pain Clinic in the nation.  I was exactly the kind of patient they were seeking to help most they said...

"Why?"

"Because without a doubt you are living with severe pain not only orthopaedically but the most severe spinal cord inflammation disease we have ever seen.  You have had seven spine surgeries, learned to walk again twice.  And yet you have never applied for disability and STILL are working and WANT to keep working.  Besides caring for and riding your horse!  You have told us the pain has reached a point where you need greater pain relief to continue living your full life longer before things worsen."

"So do you guys have a plan?"

"Yes, we do."

"We want to put you on methadone."

"Isn't that for heroin addicts?"

"Yes, but we have learned recently it works well as a longterm pain med for those like you who we know need to be on an opiate for the rest of your life.  We want to prescribe it to patients like you, because we strongly believe it will allow you to continue your full life longer.  Also, because you are a patient who has already been on opiates for pain, you are a stable patient."

"Meaning?"  

"You never run out of your medication early, give it away or try to sell it.  Another reason why you are one of the thirty we have chosen to do this with.  A lot is riding on the thirty of you and us.  If we're successful, more Pain Clinics can be launched nationally."

"So what's first?"

"Giving you a prescription you can only get filled here.  Then you, and we, your doctors, will be documenting everything.  Ready to do this?"

"After the terrible prognosis I received recently about where this horrendous inflammation disease will be taking me, my options ahead are "dire," is the word my Orthopaedic Surgeon and the Chief Neurosurgeon used.  So yes, let's do this.  And by the way, I am honored and grateful not only to have been chosen but to help you guys pave the way for the many others living with pain out there."

"And WE are honored to have YOU as our patient because you are the best candidate we could have hoped to help us.  Dr. Kopits and your team of doctors think very highly of you.  Oh, and how they all keep hoping and praying you stay on your horse when galloping from now on!"

"Hey, now I only was injured once three years ago when I fell off galloping and it wasn't my horses' fault because a huge grasshopper flew into his eye causing him to suddenly stumble west while I flew east and..."

"You broke your tailbone in TWO places instead of ONE place like everyone else because YOU like to think BIG!"

"DAMN, you guys really DO write everything down in those records!"

So I ended up successfully being on methadone for twenty-nine years.  And yes, we thirty patients did successfully help pave the way for other Pain Clinics like the first, run only by Anethesiologists who were also the only doctors allowed to write such potent scrips for their patients.

Though I was reminded early on they could still go way up yet on the dose I was originally prescribed, I refused to, for the simple reason I was only in my mid-thirties then and had yet a LONG way to go in the years ahead when I would need to increase the dose the most.  Thus for those twenty-nine years I was on methadone, I never asked to increase it.

Sadly and infuriatingly though, we never got to that place because the opiate crisis came crashing down, which has not affected the abusers, oh no.  It instead has ripped away the only help legitimate chronic pain sufferers had.

And this is the sinister way...the dangerous way I have been affected.  For you see, because methadone was killing those abusing it my doctors were suddenly not allowed to prescribe it anymore.  The problem of that with me is how long I had been on it, for methadone is very addictive.  Obviously in my situation my body was addicted to it, but not as an abuser.

My doctors launched appeal after appeal explaining my situation to get a waiver for me, but they were all denied.  When the last one was denied in December 2017, my doctors only had so much time remaining to write me prescriptions without having their licenses revoked.

I saw the writing on the wall realizing I was facing one of the most horrendous challenges of my life, and possibly dangerous.  So while I still had two months worth of methadone I began decreasing the eight I was on a day by a half each week.  On my own.  

When I saw my doctors in January 2018, I had gotten it down to six from eight.  They were not only astounded but incredulous at my resolve to do this on my own.  I reminded them we didn't have any other options so I had to act.  I did not ask for, yet at their risk they wrote me out a scrip to give me an additional month's worth to stretch the withdrawal out further.

I never deviated.  Each week I decreased the amount.  I cannot begin to describe the severe pain and withdrawal effects I was going through.  I pressed on.  There was one Pain Clinic still allowed to remain open, with two Anesthesiologists who could yet prescribe certain opiates but not methadone.  They absolutely were not taking any new patients, however after my doctors told Dr. Holt about me he was happy to take me on.

My case was documented because nothing like what I was doing had been done before.  Ever.  

Dr. Holt checked.  The longest heroin addicts had been on methadone was one to three years.  And suboxone was used to ease their withdrawal effects of methadone.  It took them one to five years to withdraw from just three years of having used methadone.  There was no documentation in the U.S. of anyone having used methadone longer than three years.

I was on it twenty-nine.  And doing it on my own without suboxone.  Dr. Holt and I discussed suboxone.  He said most addicts using the suboxone treatment then become addicted to it.  I was determined I wasn't going to put myself through more hell and decided not to use suboxone.

Dr. Holt told me he had seen a lot in his career but had never encountered a patient with as much courage and guts as he was seeing in me.

I was determined to complete the methadone intake by July of 2018.  Those last weeks were a nightmare.  Until I was finally off the methadone, Dr. Holt could not prescribe another opiate.  In my situation he got approval to put me on a potent opiate. 

However, this didn't mean my body would not continue experiencing severe withdrawal effects, and for how long, no one knew.  We were...we are in uncharted territory. 

The worse withdrawal effects were hindering the pain easing effects of the opiate Dr. Holt put me on.  He received permission to increase it to its highest strength.  Then there were, and still are, the severe sweating yet being freezing cold.  The past three summers I have been bundled up trying to get warm.  My temperature plummets to dangerous levels.  The winters are still a nightmare. 

Then there is the pain from not only the withdrawal but not having adequate pain relief anymore.  And yes we tried Marijuana oil but the withdrawal effects worked against its benefits.

So we are still continuing to chart new territory.  We have no idea how long the withdrawal effects will continue.

According to Dr. Holt who has presented my case to other doctors including those helping addicts, they are taking note of this extraordinary (their word)

Little Person who took on methadone withdrawal having been on it twenty-nine years, and doing it on her own.  

I feel damn proud of what I accomplished even if I am going through physical hell.

Now I have dared open another window sharing what I am living with in the midst of my ever worsening and very painful spinal cord inflammation disease shutting everything down.

Hopefully my having shared this here finally will give anyone reading this courage to face their own challenges whatever they may be.

May Adelaide's force be with you always...😃👍💫

Whoever Finds This I Love You...

I am not at all in a good place physically, so please bear with me as I post the following I had halfway completed for awhile and only now finished writing the hard part you will come to about Trevor, a friend.  But what this is really about 

is a message of how a song can have a powerful impact on us.  And holding onto hope.  Especially for a thirteen year old Adelaide.

For you see had it not been for the sorrow which carved me from within...had it not been for my courage and finding the best friends when needed most, I would not have soared to attaining the joy of having the very full amazing life I have had.  

Because of this you would not be reading about a Little Person galloping through the challenges of her life, or her horses, theatre, tough stuff, hilarious stuff, gratitude attitude stuff.  Someone who despite living with the most horrendous challenges and losses kept soaring anyway.  AND STILL IS.

My life at thirteen though was a dark time and filled with loss.  Dear friends were sent to foster homes, my Grandfather suddenly died.  I faced yet another new school with terrible ridicule.  And my childhood was filled with the unending violence and instability from my "parents" instead of having the love and acceptance of normal parents.

At this time the following song below, written and sung by the late Mac Davis hit the charts.  I not only embraced the song deeply, I did what the child 

does by writing the same words with my name on lots of paper, letting the wind scatter them everywhere for someone to find and believing I would.  I was that desperate for a friend then.

And someone did seek Adelaide out.  A boy two years older than me who lived down the road who had a horse.  Trevor told me he too desperately needed a friend but never would have had the courage to do what I did to find one that way.

For a very brief time we became close friends and talked a lot.  Sadly Trevor thought suicide was the only way to deal with things.  My innate fighting spirit was too strong a force for me to ever take my life.  I tried so hard to help Trevor as did his loving parents, but one day early that Fall he took his life.  It was I who found him. 

I was devastated.  

When the child in the song knew she was alone again she pressed forth by writing a new page with the same words as before.  Instead, I pressed forth by writing the poem about the darkness of a life without hope in it.  As I shared in a recent blog, because of that poem my English teacher reached out and poured her love into me.  Her love took me beyond my sorrows enabling me to soar further.  Three years later I found my four incredible mentor friends and I began my very amazing life.

So never ever let go of hope.

At the end of these lyrics below is the link to Mac Davis singing the sweet melody to these words that Adelaide too, wrote on many pages long ago before scattering them with the wind to find a friend.

   

    On a quiet street

In the city
A little old man walked along
Shufflin' thru the autumn afternoon
And the autumn leaves reminded him
Another summer's come and gone
He had a lonely night ahead
Waitin' for June

Then among the leaves
Near the orphan's home
A piece of paper caught his eye
And he stooped to pick it up with trembling hands
As he read the childish writing
The old man began to cry
'Cause the words burned inside of him
Like a brand

Whoever finds this I love you
Whoever finds this I need you
I ain't even got no one to talk to
So whoever finds this I love you

The old man's eyes searched the orphan's home
And came to rest upon a child
With her nose pressed up against the window pane
And the old man knew he'd found a friend at last
So he waved at her and smiled
And they both knew they'd spend the winter laughing at the rain

And they did spend the winter laughing at the rain
Talkin' thru the trees and exchanging little gifts
They'd made for each other
The old man would carve toys for the little girl
And she would draw picture for him of beautiful ladies
Surrounded by green trees and sunshine
And they laughed a lot
But then on the first day of June
The little girl ran to the fence to show
The old man a picture she had drawn
But he wasn't there
And somehow the little girl knew he wasn't coming back
So she went back to her little room
Took a crayon, piece of paper and wrote:

Whoever finds this I love you
Whoever finds this I need you
I ain't even got no one to talk to
So whoever finds this I love you

Songwriters: Mac Davis

Whoever Finds This, I Love You lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

*Blogger is not posting this as a working link, so for my Twitter readers I will post the link in a Tweet following this posting.     A.

https://youtu.be/P7KU7Zvjp0Y

The Amazing Sanskrit Proverb...

Look well to this day,

For it is life, the very life of life.

In its brief course lies all the realities
and verities of existence...

The bliss of growth,
The splendor of action,
The glory of power.

For yesterday is but a memory,
And tomorrow, a vision.
But today, well lived,
Makes every yesterday a dream of happiness,
And every tomorrow, a vision of hope.

Look well, therefore, to this day.

                             ‐‐‐‐The Sanskrit Proverb

As long as you ever can...

Do all the good you can,

By all the means you can,
In all the ways you can,
In all the places you can,
At all the times you can,
To all the people you can,
As long as you ever can.

                    ~John Wesley

On To Maryland...

Several weeks after The Ride Patches and I did which endeared us to thousands, it was time for us to be on our way to Maryland.  One of the donations was Sallee Horse Transportation of free transport for Patches to Maryland, with a future return to Kentucky if and when needed.

As touched on in previous blogs, I had raised Patches from a tiny foal and we were very close.  Due to the extraordinary ways the public became so inspired and touched by our story with all the media coverage, two television stations wanted to be there when Patches would leave first...then I would follow the next day in my car.

So there was quite a crowd when Sallee Horse Transportation arrived.  Only they didn't send just
any small van.  They sent a HUGE semi-truck size horse van!  And due to its size the road had to be closed by police, since the van was so huge it couldn't fit in the gate of the place where I had Patches...the farm with the miniature horses.

The same two policemen who escorted Patches and I during The Ride insisted upon being there to help this day too.

Unbelievably, Patches would be the only horse in that truck!  The whole truck just for him!  With the crowd watching and the television cameras rolling it was time for me to bring Patches down the tree shaded lane.  Everything suddenly became quiet.  As Patches and I neared the ramp leading inside the truck the driver met us and asked for Patches' lead shank.  He explained only drivers were allowed to load horses so I complied.

As the driver began leading Patches up the ramp, Patches suddenly realized I wasn't leading him and slammed to a stop jerking his head around to look at me.  When he did I realized I suddenly had a huge lump in my throat.🥺

Patches wasn't about to move.  At that moment the farm owner said to the driver, "Uh, sir, Patches is not going up that ramp without Adelaide by his side."

The driver began to say something about company policy when our two policemen stepped forward.  They said the responsibility would be theirs if anything happened but nothing would because they had traveled with us those ten miles witnessing the bond we shared.  So Sam, the driver handed the lead shank back to me.

Without a problem, I led Patches into the van and Sam helped me get Patches situated in a small stall with hay and water.  I sent his bucket and lead shank on for the farm in Maryland.  They too, were located on a small road and Sam had to park a long way from their farm.  Patches arrived there at 3am!  So in the dark, in strange hands, and in a strange place, Patches was led to his new farm.  I was SO proud to hear how well he handled it, and how everyone had already fallen in love with him!

Very early that same morning I too, left Kentucky for Maryland...a twelve hour drive.  I drove straight to the farm.  It was pitch dark.  I could barely make out what appeared to be a barn roof.  Then I softly said Patches' name and immediately heard him respond.  So back and forth we went until I felt my way to his stall.  He was SO happy to "see" me that he kept rubbing his head up and down me.

So Adelaide, horse, cat, rabbit, and goldfish had finally arrived in Maryland on the wings of the thousands who were deeply touched and inspired by our story.  And our story was far from over.😃💫

So just how DO you get ON your horse...

When people hear I own and ride horses the question I am asked first and more than any other is, "How DO you get ON your horse?"  Usually followed by, "How do you STAY on?"  You see I tried saddles but I had more trouble staying on WITH a saddle, both English and Western, than I ever did riding bareback.  With short legs and all the leather, even using stirrups I would pop up (and off) like a cork when I gripped, with my horse looking at me like I was crazy which they are very good at doing.  Besides, I love to feel at one when riding my horses anyway, which I do riding bareback.  And I stay on.  Well for the most part anyway.🐎😂🐎

So back to how I GET on.  I had such a bond with all my horses they understood the fact that when it came time for me to get on them, they then needed to stand next to something.  

Usually I would lead them next to my car, climb on the hood of the car then get on.  But horses cannot always be depended upon to stand perfectly still for more than ten seconds so I had to act fast, yet now and then with hilarious results.  I cannot begin to tell you how many times I would propel myself too hard and go sailing right OVER them to the ground and then REALLY get that certain crazy look because you see horses can be very expressive in conveying exactly what it is they are thinking, especially when they think their hooman is crazy for leaping in the air from an object hoping to land upon their back.😂

If not the car hood I would use fallen trees, or climb on a fence, or if lucky an actual mounting block.

Dismounting was always easier.  Usually I would slide off and drop to the ground mostly on my feet but often unceremoniously on my rear.  Again getting that crazy look.😂

Horses sometimes are unpredictable.  Sometimes they suddenly stop unexpectedly.  When this happened, I would go headfirst sliding down their neck, if I was lucky.  Occasionally though my flying high up in the air a bit before reaching the ground with considerable aplomb could occur.🙃

By the way all these "events" I just described would beautifully, brilliantly happen without incident most of the time.  However, that one moment when the "event"

happened without brilliance would be THE MOMENT 

an audience would be casting their full attention upon this Little Lady dressed like a hippie climbing on the hood of her car mind you, to throw herself high into the air right OVER the backs of her horses to land on the other side with her amazing aplomb before dissolving into hysterical laughter.🤣

Sooo, now my dear ones you know the ways this Little Person got on her horses, and the many ways she also "got off" her horses too.🐎😂🐎

                               Bashum at fourteen

The day Patches remembered me...

Along the way now and then I have been blessed with those bright, amazing touch of wonder moments.  Those rare moments when magic happens.

Not long after Patches came into my life, I had yet another spine surgery.  Through no fault of my dear surgeon everything went wrong.  I suddenly began bleeding out thirteen hours in.  Immediately following nineteen hours of surgery, a huge hematoma formed on my spinal cord and began pressing on it.  I was becoming paralyzed.  My surgeon rushed back in, and it took another four hours to remove the hematoma.  Twenty-three hours in surgery that day!😱

Two days later on Christmas Day in ICU, my dear surgeon and I discovered I still had a tiny bit of movement in a few toes.  For all I was worth I focused on my toes until they ALL eventually began moving.  Then my feet, legs.  I had a full life to get back to!

The spine surgery was two days before Christmas.  It was Spring when I finally reached the place where I could walk with a cane instead of a walker.  I wondered if Patches would still remember me.  He was only six months old when I "disappeared," and now he was ten months old! 

One bright Sunday friends from the farm offered to take me with them to the farm since I still couldn't drive.  

The farm was busy that day.  I was so touched because many had come out when they heard I was going to be there, and we were all so thrilled to finally see each other again!

I saw Patches way off in the distance high on a hill.  Someone offered to go get him for me.  

"Thank you!  First, please wait a moment," I said.  

I cupped my hands and called his name.  Suddenly Patches head shot up and he began excitedly looking around as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing.  I called again and waved my arms.

All of a sudden he loudly neighed and began flying 

down that field.  Then he briefly disappeared into the small grove of trees.  Suddenly Patches burst out the other side at full gallop charging up the hill at the same time so excited, he was trying to neigh but was squeaking instead.

EVERYTHING but Patches stopped right where they were, watching.  Tough horsemen were wiping tears from their eyes.  We all realized we were witnessing something very beautiful and magical.  Even all the horses stopped and watched the scene.

Patches slammed to a stop a few feet from me, then walked up to me happily rubbing his head up and down me again and again.  Oh my, did he ever remember me!

This...was indeed...one of those amazing...rare, "touch of wonder" gems in life I will hold forever and never let go from my grasp.💫🐎💕🐎💫

Prayer for a Monday...

Thank you God for standing by me so far on 

a Monday.  With Your help I have not been impatient, rude, unkind, critical, ungrateful, 

or even angry yet.

BUT you see God, I must be getting out of this bed 
very soon now to actually begin the day and once I do, that is when I will REALLY be needing Your help most. 

PLEASE...

Our direction...

The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.

~Oliver Wendall Holmes

Helping veterans and a coworker...

Another one of these interval jobs I had following long hospital stays was working in both the civilian and federal government capacity helping veterans obtain their benefits.  

The job was located on a military base far out in 

the country to accommodate military helicopters.  There was even a base tavern for base personnel open in evenings.    

My civilian coworker was a tough lady who had a heart of gold, cussed like a sailor, drank like a fish, and smoked like a chimney.  Her name was Rita.  And Rita had quite a story too.  Five years earlier Rita and her dear husband were driving into town to get take-out dinners for their four children and them.  A drunk driver hit their car head on killing Rita's soul mate instantly and nearly her.  She came close to losing her leg, yet fought like hell to walk again despite the prognosis.  

So here she was suddenly a widow with four kids.  She soon landed the job at the military base.  Though she usually kept people at arms length, she immediately formed a bond with me as I too, fought to walk yet again.  And she loved my wicked sense of humor.😂

Now Rita, who had never drank before this job, took up drinking at the base tavern.  As her drinking worsened she kept begging me to join her.  Since I didn't drink due to being on pain medication (and still haven't for the same reason) Rita would have me drive her home and spend the night, which I did for a time.  I got to know her kids and they adored me as I did them.  The youngest was deaf and thrilled to have someone outside her family who knew Sign Language.

One night Rita REALLY got drunk.  Finally, I got her to leave.  Only there was a problem.  My car didn't start.  Though I could reach the pedals and drive her sports car without using extensions, technically I wasn't supposed to.  Unfortunately there was no way to remove my extensions on my car without tools which we obviously didn't have.  Rita begged me to drive her car anyway.

"Well whash could go wr-wr-wrong?" she said. "Aww, come on Shadelaide, we've jus' got to get home!  My k-k-kids...hiccup...shwill be waitin' ups for ush.  How elsh can we...hiccup...do thish?"

Thankfully we didn't have far to go on a country backroad.  After some silent prayers on my part I drove.  And then...

"Shaydelaide, I wanna shmoke now."

"NOT NOW!"

"Oh but Shaydelaide, I...hiccup...NEED a shmoke!"

"You're going to wait!"

"Yesh, mam!"  As she attempted a salute and accidentally whacked me in the face.🥴

Then she got all teary and mushy on me.

"Shaydelaide, do youse know yoursh the b-b-bestest friend I...hiccup...have eversh had?  Yoush r-really are."

"That's sweet."

"Shaydelaide, can I shmoke yet?"

"NO!"

"Uh oh.  Shaydelaide...hiccup...I need to pee."

"YOU'RE GOING TO HOLD IT!"

"Yesh shir!!  I mean...hiccup...your majusht...your majush...oh hell...your highness-sess.  Uh, Shaydelaide, what am I shitting on?"

"You're sitting on your coat."

"Uh-oh...hiccup...I think it-est wet."🙃

We made it.  That was the most crazy drive I ever made.  And the last with Rita.  

Though the word for this is called an intervention now, this is what her kids and I did by seizing the moment the next day.  We knew she needed help. 

 

I told her drowning her sorrow in alcohol was making her kids feel like orphans because she was lost in drinking.  I also shared how she could scar them for life if she didn't get a grip on herself and acknowledge she had a very serious problem.  We understood why she was drinking, but she was letting it destroy her life and her kids who needed her.  From that moment she got sober and changed.

She still swore and smoked like crazy though, but we were all thrilled she wasn't drinking anymore.

Soon after, Theatre which always had hold of my heart came calling again and I galloped off to another bright new chapter of my journey.  

For a time I kept in touch with everyone.  Rita eventually married again and life was good for all.  Said I would always be the best friend she ever had.

"Adelaide, you really saved my life and gave my kids their mother back.  But you know what?  I still can't remember how we got home that night."

"That's WHY I intervened."💫  

"And we're all so grateful you did."💕

You'll Never Gallop Alone...

I adore the song, "You'll Never Walk Alone," and share the powerful lyrics below.  Only in true Adelaide fashion altered the lyrics slightly when I was very young...

When you gallop through a storm
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark

At the end of a storm
There's a golden sky 
And the sweet silver song of a lark

Gallop on through the wind
Gallop on through the rain
Though your dreams be tossed and blown 

Gallop on, gallop on
With hope in your heart
And you'll never gallop alone

Saving my horse Patches From Slaughter...

I want to share how Patches, the little unwanted foal in dire need and I came together.  My previous horse went blind, but a lady looking for a companion for her blind horse in a safe facility was thrilled our mutual vet told her about Havilla, so I donated Havilla to her.  I then began looking for a foal to raise and have for its' lifetime.

The farm where I boarded my horses for years was a beautiful place, owned by brothers who could be tough with their horses.  One day Paul called me to say he had found the perfect foal, a registered six month old Quarter horse colt he put in the box stall at the farm.  

Then he warned me, "The man threw in this three month runt of a foal for me to get rid of and it is in the stall too.  BE CAREFUL!  It's very dangerous!  It took four of us and a lot of beer to finally get him!"  

My heart immediately went out to the "dangerous runt."

I rushed to the farm and found the lovely fancy colt and the "dangerous runt," who had just been ripped away from his mama by four loud beer drinking men, with a heavy long rope tied around his neck looking very dejected.  As I slowly entered the stall the "runt" began to back up but I stepped on the rope.  He trembled.  I whispered I was only going to stroke his forehead so he could end the day by being touched GENTLY.  He relaxed.

From the barn phone I called Paul.  

"I'm taking the 'runt!'"  

He kindly replied, "What?!!  You're crazy!!!  He's dangerous I tell you!"

I said, "I'm taking him anyway!  Besides, you will have no trouble selling the fancy colt, and I will save you the trouble of taking the "runt" to slaughter."

"I still think you're making a huge mistake you'll regret!" 

"I'm taking him anyway.  How much?"

The next day I took sweet feed, a small halter, and grooming stuff with me.  The "runt" began to back up, then stopped...without trembling.  While he ate, I gently groomed him with no sign of any fear or "danger" at all.

Patches was a palomino pony with white patches, hence the name I immediately gave him so he would not become known as "the runt."

Day three, he nickered when he saw me.

I needed to get him out of the very dirty, dusty stall.  Told Paul I was turning him out.  

"What?!!  You're crazy!  You'll never be able to catch him again!"

"Don't worry," I said.  "We've got this."

I turned him out.  Day four, I arrived and found Patches on a hill.  I called him.  He stared intently.  When I went up to Patches, he made no attempt to run.

On day five when I called him, Patches neighed and came galloping TO me!  The "dangerous runt" was safe, 

loved, and mine.  We became very VERY close, sharing a wonderful twenty-nine years together.  They know when they are in danger and they know when they are safe.  And love grew Patches into a much larger pony than was expected.🐎💕🐎

When Patches was a little over a year old I put lead shanks on each side of his halter one day.  Got on him, and simply began riding him.  THAT was all it took!

One day Paul happened to come along and see me riding Patches.  He stammered, "You're...you're RIDING him!  How did you...I...I can't believe this!"

"Yep!  This is the 'dangerous runt' bound for slaughter. 

Still think I'm crazy?!!"🐎😃🐎

Patches At Twenty

Another Round Of Theatre Hilarity 101...

Many people outside of life in theatre aside from being an audience member now and then, have very little awareness for those backstage who devote their lives relentlessly working very hard to make theatre magic happen.  

And happen without anything ever going wrong on Opening Night.  Or on any other night.  

Hopefully...😂🎭

Throughout North America during the summer months many theatres and Shakespeare organizations do three or more plays by Shakespeare in outdoor parks each year.  This is a way to introduce theatre to many who may not get to have a theatre experience otherwise. 

One summer a small theatre I designed for scheduled three Shakespeare plays in a lovely park.  However due to a construction job, the third and last play, "Romeo And Juliet" had to be changed to another park.  A park just a bit LESS lovely than the first, as the area we had to construct a set upon was surrounded very closely by a field with cows, and another with horses.

It so happened not long after I met Aiden's parents 

who adored me as much as I did them, were quite keen on not only getting to see a professional production of "Romeo And Juliet," but to see the work their future daughter in-law did which they were proudly bragging about to all their friends.  They also invited them all to come see the performance too.

Aiden and I did our utmost to try to dissuade them from choosing THAT particular production but they wouldn't hear of it!  They had their hearts set on seeing the one Shakespearian play they knew.  And to bring all their friends, so we had to hope for the best.

Yet as you may have gathered by now in reading these hopefully entertaining Theatre Hilarity blogs of mine I have been sharing here, often events unfold in very unexpected ways beyond our control.

Since this park happened to also be in close proximity to the Chesapeake Bay too, on this particular evening we could see wind was becoming a concern.  Not good, not good.

For these outdoor productions my sets were built on the grass.  EXPOSED, you might say.  So my intern and

I constructed a sturdier set than usual which actually turned out to be a very good thing.  Mostly.

Please keep in mind we did not have stage left or 

stage right wings in the traditional sense because 

we were outdoors in the middle of nowhere, you see.

Laura, our costumer of course was there, as was our Lighting Designer, James, and myself.

During Act I Laura's job was to assist "Juliet" in a quick dress change.

Only it became The Ripping event heard around the world.😱  Followed by a very loud expletive (which was NOT by the way, Adelaide who said it!😂).

For as our dear Laura began helping "Juliet" with her dress change, RRRRR-IPPPPPPE.  All of us "backstage" froze with horror as our eyes fell upon poor Laura and "Juliet."

So too, were the eyes of The Audience, including Aiden, his parents, and everyone they ever knew who came with them.😳

You see it was Laura who delivered the loud F-Bomb!  And it wasn't "Juliet's" dress coming off that failed.  Oh no, not that at all.  For after the loud expletive, Laura cried out, "My pants split!"😱

And she had very good reason to be horrified, for on 

all days for the Costume Designer to have her pants split as wide as the Amazon River out in the middle of nowhere, she happened to be wearing underpants with large bright red lettering on the rear which said, "I'M NAUGHTY," which could very clearly be seen like a 

neon light.

Ohhh, this was not a good day for our dear Laura to have chosen THOSE very underpants to wear.😂

Being the loyal staff members they tried very hard to be at that moment, the male staff members totally lost it.

They were rolling in the grass laughing in hysterics.  

At this point the audience began laughing out of 

control too, but had no clue other than The Huge  RRRRR-IPPPPPPE heard around the world as to 

exactly what they were laughing about.🙃

Now remember we were out in the middle of nowhere here, with very little means at our disposal to repair pants split wide open revealing the words, "I'm Naughty."  However, I just happened to bring along an item in case the stage needed a temporary fix.  Never ever underestimate the miracle this item is capable of for it literally saved Laura's butt.  You will be absolutely amazed by what Duct Tape can fix...😂👍

Following the RRRRR-IPPPPPPE heard around the 

world and our dear Laura's Naughtiness we assumed there couldn't possibly be any more excitement for one night, but alas, this was not to be.

For one of the mares in the horse pasture decided to pee near the fence.  Now I have seen horses pee and shit a thousand times.  Aside from those moments I would suddenly find myself accidentally being the one getting peed or shit upon by one of my horses because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, a horse peeing is really a non-event to me.  So I especially was not prepared for this event to take the attention of the audience or our staff away from Shakespeare that it did. 

But it did.

Because when horses pee they can REALLY PEE!  We are talking Niagara Falls here folks!  I'm not kidding!😂

And for the hoomans transfixed by watching this event, 

not even Shakespeare himself coming back to life could have held their attention like the horse peeing did!🤩

Remember the cows?  During late spring into summer 

a farmer keeps his prize bull with the cows for the sake of making calves.  Well apparently no one happened to mention this very important fact to our Artistic Director when he was shown the park where we would be staging Romeo And Juliet.

Unfortunately the bull did not give us the consideration of holding off his love making until AFTER the play, or at least confining his activities during Intermission.  Oh no, not THIS bull!😱

For you see just after Act II began when things are SUPPOSED to be getting really serious in "Romeo And Juliet," RIGHT BY THE FENCE CLOSEST TO THE AUDIENCE, the bull mounted his love interest!🤣  

Then the friggin bull began MOOING.  LOUDLY MOOOOOING!  EVERYONE including the actors, were now focusing their attention on the BOVINE romance scene happening before them!💥

BOVINE BONKING had totally derailed our Shakespeare production!🤣

For most of the audience and our staff were not used to seeing these kinds of things unless you're Adelaide of course.😂

After the bonking the bull and his love interest for the moment, finally ambled off together.

We thought surely nothing else could happen.  

But it did.

And then...AND THEN...right at the climatic moment near the end of "Romeo And Juliet," the winds REALLY began picking up.  A chauffeur of an elderly couple he worked for waiting in the car suddenly came running over.  Said the weather forecaster indicated a funnel cloud had been sighted nearby and we should take cover!😱

However this situation was having no effect on the 

bull though I must say, as he was now bonking another cow.  I hadn't realized their "recovery" turnaround time in-between bonking was that fast.😂 

Anyway, we got the audience members and ourselves under the only place we could take cover under in the middle of nowhere, which happened to be the set.  Thankfully the set I designed included a stage about 4' above the ground, so we all crammed beneath it for an eternity.  Aiden's parents for some reason thought this was an ideal time to introduce me to all their friends.

Luckily nothing but high winds happened and the set my intern and I constructed held up quite well.  Aiden's parents and their friends were very pleased.  But they were all a bit confused though, as to just why the bonking bull was included in OUR version of "Romeo And Juliet."🙄

Aiden explained to all it was because OUR version was 

a modern one they were VERY privileged to get to see first...😂

And we all left it at that.👏🎭😂🤣😂🎭👏💫

The Ride Of My Life...

W. C. Fields once said, "This old world is a very tough place and you're darn lucky if you can get out of it alive."  And this world IS a very tough place indeed.  We ALL have tough challenges.  Tough challenges need tough optimism.  Often it is easier said than done.  Yet I always tend to take a deep breath and just PLUNGE forth.  Sometimes I've PLUNGED BACKWARDS though, but sometimes, the plunge forth is sweet, oh so very amazingly sweet.

My last horse Patches was a foal in dire need of being rescued when he came into my life.  How he came into my life is quite a story too, for a later blog.  In the late 1980's following spine surgery I had to learn to walk again for the second time, but was darn grateful I could.  Still there were severe complications, so I traveled to Johns-Hopkins to see the world renown Dr. Kopits, who devoted his career to Little People.  That I got to see him at all was the result of a plunge I made.  Due to the severity of my condition he asked if I could move to Baltimore.  "Why yes, of course!  I will go to my money tree!  No problem!"  I reminded him I came with a horse and cat package.😏  Financially there was just no way.  Impossible.

After I returned to Kentucky I had this idea but shoved it away.  Everything could go wrong.  Yet the idea persisted.  I would ride Patches 10 miles, involve the media, and seek pledges for each mile.  If I plunged BACK trying all this the media would be right there to show it, so I HAD to shove the crazy idea aside.

Then I was given a nudge.  More like a huge SHOVE.  I was moving Patches from one farm to one closer to my home.  One day, leaving the farm I still had him at, it suddenly came to me out of nowhere to clock the miles from one farm to the other.  I did.  

The distance...was...EXACTLY...10...MILES!

I took a deep breath and PLUNGED forth.

And what a plunging forth of faith it was!  It HAD to be.  

I contacted both the printed and television media.  "You're doing WHAT?!!"😓  

Since the first mile of The Ride involved riding down a 4 lane highway, I had to ask if police could assist.  "You're doing WHAT?!!"😓

I only asked for and received promise of a few pledges prior to The Ride because everything depended upon actually DOING The Ride with the help of media.

Then the day came.  Everybody showed up.  Patches was only 2 years old when I did this, the deep bond we shared enabling us to embark on this amazing little journey at all escorted by police and a media entourage as we began.  Aside from the traffic noise and two bridges...the one I thought Patches wouldn't have a problem with he did at first, and the one I thought would be a problem, wasn't.  Other than that we completed it in 3 hours!  

The newspaper and television pieces hit the next day.  And then...AND THEN our journey REALLY took off!  People were SO touched and inspired they couldn't get enough of us.  No one could remember my name but they sure remembered "Patches!"  I quickly became known as "the Patches lady!"  With a business prior to The Ride, in the event donations did actually come in 

we set up a trust fund, and the donations began pouring in.   

Not all was monetary.  Since I needed transportation to get Patches to Baltimore, one of the largest national horse transportation firms donated their services.  Mechanics overhauled my car so I could get there too.  A vet donated his fee to vet Patches with the paperwork needed to cross state lines.  It went on and on.

Because of the keen interest in our amazing story the media kept coming to the farm to get more coverage of Patches and I, like the way he would come running to me when he heard me call him.  The news pieces were lovely.

Yet it didn't stop in Kentucky.  The govenor of Maryland at that time learned about us and welcomed Patches and I to Maryland!   In all, The Ride received just over $11,000.00 in money and donations.  We were on our way.

All because I took a HUGE crazy leap of faith and plunged forth.  And it all went FORTH...not BACK!😊

Newspaper photo of Patches and I following The Ride

Aiden's Music Box...

There are moments in our lives where it may take just a word, a place, or a song to bring the memories of cherished moments flooding back...

Long ago and far away on a dark December Sunday after Aiden and I cared for our horses, we finally made 

a stop at a old place near the farm in rural Maryland which sold antiques and all kinds of treasure.  It was a old weathered place but very warm and cozy inside.

There were a few chairs and tables too where coffee and homemade pie could be ordered.  No way would Aiden's sweet tooth ever let us pass THAT opportunity by!

The proprietors of the place, Mr. and Mrs. Shropshire obviously were quite intrigued with us being one of us was a bit unique you see.  When they then learned we BOTH had horses they were even more intrigued.  They had two questions. 

"How did the two of you meet?"

Aiden answered, "Well, my horse wouldn't let me catch her, but Adelaide's horse always comes running to her.

My horse became buddies with hers so I had no choice BUT to get to know this lady!"

Then they asked me the infamous, "How DO you get ON your horse?!!"

We had a lovely visit with the Shropshires.  Since Dr. Kopits was well known in Maryland they knew about 

his work with Little People and asked if I knew him.

"Ohhh yes, very much so.  Dr. Kopits is why I moved here.  He asked if I could for surgeries.  He is beside himself with happiness for Aiden and I.  He even has insisted on walking me down the aisle to give me away for our wedding!"

"My oh my, you two are getting married?!!  When?"

Aiden told them.  "April 1st!"

"April Fool's Day?!!"

"Of course!  Why not?  We're fools for each other!  It will be a FUN day for a wedding!  Besides, Dr. Kopits told us he's free that weekend so Adelaide and I grabbed it."

After we were done eating pie we looked all around 

the place.  And that's when Aiden saw it.  A lovely old brass and glass music box.  After he wound it and pressed the little lever the sweet tinkling purring music box melody of "Unchained Melody" poured out filling the air and filling our hearts.  We looked at each other in wordless wonder for "Unchained Melody" was one of OUR songs.

We HAD to buy it.  Only the Shropshires wouldn't hear 

of us paying for the music box.  They dearly insisted on giving it to us for a wedding gift!  We were SO touched.

Then they had one more question.  Since they were aware of the cruel ridicule Little People live with they wondered how we dealt with it.

I explained it was because I lived with cruel ridicule all my life, obviously I was more "used" to it than Aiden.  It really was hard for him and understandably so to see and hear what the non-humans were capable of doing.

It was a challenge for him to ignore such behavior for everything within him wanted only to protect me.  He too had to learn ignoring is the only way. 

I miss him so.  Yet oh, how I treasure the time we had.

I still have that precious music box.  For years I could hardly touch it.  Every now and then though I play it's sweet soft melody so dear to my heart.💕🎶

Oh my love, my darling

I've hungered for your touch

A long lonely time

And time goes by so slowly 

And time can do so much

Are you still mine

I need your love

I need your love

God speed your love to me

Lonely rivers flow to the sea to the sea

To the open arms of the sea

Lonely rivers sigh wait for me wait for me

I'll be coming home wait for me

Oh my love, my darling

I've hungered for your touch

A long lonely time

And time goes by so slowly 

And time can do so much

Are you still mine

I need your love

I need your love

God speed your love to me

Adelaide's Rover Song...

THIS...has been one of MY life defining songs for decades because I was born with the spirit to wander.  And horses and theatre set me free to wander, free to hope, free to soar, free to love and be loved.

I have been a rover,

I have walked alone,

Gone a hundred highways,

Never found a home,

Still and all I'm happy,

The reason is you see,

[Many] times along the way

Love's [been and is] good to me.

                     Rod McKuen

Because, I showed up...

How can I become outgoing like you are?"

Oh my, I cannot begin to tell the many times I have 

been asked this, especially after I began doing speaking engagements.  

The more I became sought after by those seeking to have what they saw in me, I realized how much my horrendous childhood had actually necessitated in me the need to reach out for what I was not getting, like love and acceptance.  So from the age of three I was already making friends by not only finding in others what so sadly was missing from my parents, but having a gift for also being the kind of fun loving inspired kid/adult others enjoyed being around...wanted to be around.  

Once a lady approached me after a talk I gave to a Women's Group.  She was a Social Worker and had a client who happened to be a Little Person.  Her client, much older than me still lived with her parents, never learned to drive, and never went anywhere unless with her parents.  Her parents were so overprotective she became imprisoned.  The Social Worker hoped if she and her parents could meet and talk with me this could be a catalyst of change.  When the Social Worker told her about me she became very excited to meet me.  

Sadly though, we never got to meet.  Fear.  The parents were horrified their daughter would even THINK to entertain thoughts of leaving.  They refused to let her ever see the Social Worker again, convincing the Little Person she HAD to be protected by them.  

Though I never met her I often think about how paralyzed she was by the fear of her parents and her own fear robbing her of having a life and one devoid of friends.  Sadly she's not alone for there are other Little People and many non-height challenged people who also let fear and insecurity keep them from having a life too.  Many become crushed by bullying, ridicule, or not having what is perceived as being the perfect body.  I also find people forever take for granted the profound blessings they have right in their very grasp with just being able to see, hear, walk, talk, smile, laugh, think, love, hug, and reach a shelf higher than a five year old is able to reach.  

Often after I have encouraged people to become aware of what they do have in their grasp this plants a seed of courage.  When that seed of courage grows it opens the door holding them back. 

I am so grateful for my innate determination and courage always enabling me to rise above the terrible circumstances I grew up with besides the many physical ones.  The very sorrow of these became my fight...my very reason to latch onto the far greater joy found in the gift of friends and being able to live one hell of an amazing life.  

How?  

I always put myself out there and show up.  I plunge in with my courage...spunk...and sense of humour.  And I always have the joy in discovering others I am so damn grateful to be on this journey with.

Like the ways I have shared here of how my Theatre, artists, writers, and horse friends all amazingly find each other, even on Social Media. 

In fact a dear friend in the U.K. and I were DM-ing about this gift of wonder just the other day.  For decades I have had close ties with the U.K. anyway.  So on Social Media is a interesting U.K. group pertaining to old postcards people in the U.K. sent each other, usually while traveling.  Then those of us in the group come up with hilarious responses to, or a continuation of what was written.  It's fun, and at times has been a very sweet diversion for unfolding events in this crazy world.  

Anyway, my friend and I began commenting on each others' expertise in the hilarious postcard responses we were coming up with.  Then we followed each other.  As I tend to be outgoing this soon began the ripple effect for discovering more amazing new friends I have also come to hold dear and am very grateful for.  Though 

we all may never meet in person and are separated by distance, our bonds of friendship are as deep and cherished as any I have known through the years.  All  because my friends and I showed up and put ourselves out there.    

Remember my blog on aplomb?  I described a beautiful scene which happened in busy Aisle Ten one day...

[In a city I once lived was a gentleman who was the official Santa, and he even looked just like Santa too, with a real white beard, red clothing, and spectacles.  

One day during the Christmas Season, I was in a busy grocery store shopping.  As I hurried around a corner up a crowded aisle I literally ran right smack into Santa.

For a moment we both just looked at each other in complete surprise.

Seizing the moment (there was a reason why I nailed an A in Acting 101 and am known for my courage), I blurted out, "Santa!  I know I should be with the other elves up North right now but there are things we REALLY need from this store!"

He jumped on it with me and replied, "Ho Ho Ho!  We've been so busy I understand my little one!  I had to come for Mrs. Claus.  She's making cookies.  Did the reindeer bring you too?"

"No, because they are all with you!  But I came our other way of getting around by using the magical snowmobile."

Back and forth we went.  You should have seen not 

only the faces of the kids in that aisle but all the adults too!  Everyone was just totally transfixed in sheer amazement and wonder, absolutely loving us to pieces!😃  

By seizing a moment with aplomb we gave a bunch of harried adults and tired kids a moment of sheer magic they will likely never forget.  Besides having fun doing it.  A beautiful touch of wonder moment in Aisle Ten.]

What I hadn't shared in the piece above is because of that one moment "Santa" asked if he could share what happened with a friend.  The friend was a newspaper reporter who wrote a piece entitled, "An Aisle Ten Moment Of Wonder."  This in turn touched lives since the piece detailed how this Little Person ran into Santa, seized a moment with aplomb and magic happened.

A family who witnessed the Aisle Ten magic that day got in touch with me.  We remained friends for many years.  Santa and I did too until his passing.

When we show up...when we have the courage to plunge forth and put ourselves out there, the bright wonder, the treasure, and joyful magic of friendship happens.💫