And Then Those Hilarious Bloopers...

As I have shared, as soon as anyone hears I own and soar bareback with the wind upon horses, THE question I am asked is not what kind or colour but...BUT, "How DO you get ON your horse?!!" 

 

So when television stations were featuring Patches and I during the time of our famous Ride they wanted to film my getting on Patches because our fanbase were keen to know this along with a zillion others.  

When I addressed this very subject in my funny blog, "How A Little Person Gets On Her Horse," I touched on the fact horses cannot be depended upon to remain still for more than a few seconds.  So this is when hilarious things can happen during the getting on process.

First what I used most was my car hood.  All of my horses knew the process which involved them standing next to my car as I quickly climbed onto the hood then got onto their backs.  Twenty-four out of twenty-five times the process would go quite well.  And usually when that one time happened when it did NOT go quite so well there would never fail but be an audience on hand...dying in hysterics.🤣

Which is exactly what happened the day when these television stations were filming segments on how I got on Patches, got off Patches, and cared for Patches.  They had already done a segment filming how Patches came galloping to me when I called his name.  And that segment actually went quite well because once and awhile, Patches in his excitement to come to me could misjudge the stopping distance necessary at a full gallop and slide into me.🙃

Anyway, I lined Patches up next to my car then rushed to get onto the hood of the car before he moved.  Only he did just a bit.  No problem.  I knew I could still make the distance leaping through the air.  But the 

thing is you see, I needed to really propel myself to accomplish this amazing feat, having done it successfully many times.  

However, if one propels oneself TOO hard, one can go sailing high to the sky right OVER the horse all the way to the ground with a somewhat very dignified landing with aplomb.  Which is exactly what happened.  As the cameras were rolling.  With crews...laughing.  In hysterics, you see.🤣

Next the crews wanted to get a clip of Patches and 

I galloping towards them from the fields.  Patches and I were doing quite wonderfully, that is until he decided to suddenly stop way before we arrived at the place where we were SUPPOSED to make a grandiose stop.  I then promptly went flying over his head but very heroically managed to land on my feet, again showing off my considerable amazing aplomb ability.

THIS...was turning out to be one of THOSE days.🥴  

Next the crews wanted to film me caring for Patches, such as grooming him and cleaning out his hooves.

To clean the hooves of a horse one must balance their hoof in one's lap while squatting, then deftly clean and check each hoof.  Usually there very seldom ever is an instance where anything can go wrong during the process.  Only cameras were rolling this time.  For as I was squatting with his right REAR hoof in my lap, I suddenly noticed his tail raising up which can mean only ONE thing.  Patches was SHITTING.  I managed to dive out of the way JUST...in...time.  PLOP.🤣

Then it was time to film me grooming Patches.  Now what could POSSIBLY happen doing THIS, right?!!  

WRONG.

Patches absolutely loved whenever I groomed his back or scratched his back.  When I did it felt so good he would completely relax with closed eyes loving it.  However, on these very rare occasions Patches would REALLY relax.  And I mean RELAX here folks.  As in a certain organ of his anatomy dropping down.  THAT kind of relax.😱  

Well Patches happened to get THAT kind of relaxed right during filming.  

Ohhh, they REALLY began laughing then.  I mean they were just totally dying in hysterics.🤣  

Finally, they wanted me to get back on Patches again and film us galloping away across the huge expanse of fields.  Now with THIS segment everything went right.  Beautifully right as we galloped off without wings soaring away into the vast bright distance.😃

I asked the crews to give me their sworn promise to PLEASE never ever use those blooper parts of the filming in anything.  They very emphatically assured 

me they absolutely would not THINK of EVER doing such a thing.🙄 

Several months later for our fanbase a lovely thirty minute piece was done all about our very touching story again.  And within the piece just happened to be this hilarious bloopers segment with all the many bloopers Patches and I had managed to very successfully accumulate...🤣