Funny Adelaide Bits...

"WHOO HOO HOOOOOOOO," all twelve of us yelled after cramming ourselves together onto a large slick section of vinyl flooring we borrowed from the Set Design Shop to plunge down the Mt. Everest of hills with perfect packed down snow.

Only there was a slight problem though.  Near the bottom one had to be very careful (assuming one had any control of what one was riding on) to aim going stage left because you see if one went stage right one would plow into a creek.  Plunging into a creek during winter is something most of us try very hard to avoid if possible. 

The other friends I was plunging down this huge Mt. Everest hill with were the ones I wrote about in my blog describing Dr. Sonderling's last ever elite Scene Painting class we had the honor of having been chosen for.

Since we had to spend so much of our time together painting assignments on MASSIVE canvas flats we nine young men and two young ladies became very close. Actually Dr. Sonderling was profoundly touched by just how supportive and close a group we were.  

The last day of his last class Dr. Sonderling said to us as he kept choking back tears, "All of you have formed 

a very touching deep bond always looking out for each other, helping each other, having fun, laughing and hugging.  A camaraderie I have not seen like this ever before.  The eleven of you have become very special to me.  I could not have asked to end my teaching career with a finer group.  And all talented as hell too.  I feel so proud and privileged to know you.  Please keep in touch with me!  By the way, what in the world are you going to do with the vinyl you asked to borrow?  I'm curious."

Sooo, this is how seventy-two year old Dr. Sonderling wound up on this large piece of slick vinyl flooring with his eleven students careening down Mt. Everest at high speed.  From the top of this hill none of us could see how at stage left where we HAD to go if we wanted to avoid plowing into the creek, a very unexpected rise had been built in the snow for the purpose of becoming very airborne. 

Now I have a feeling my dear readers are wondering what happened, are you not?  I daresay you would really like to know how our flight landed.  So please hold on tight and keep reading to the end...the...very...end.😃 

All of my other ten friends in dear Dr. Sonderling's final 

Scene Painting class and I kept in touch with each other through the years (well now you at least know WE survived Mt. Everest anyway...sort of...😂).  And we all kept our promise to keep in touch with Dr. Sonderling the remainder of his life too (yes, he too survived Mt. Everest...kind of🙃).

Although my other ten friends and I kept in touch, the last time we all were ever together was that plunge we made down Mt. Everest.  For as life often does, especially when one's heart is in theatre, the roads we travel and places theatre takes us are many.  Two of my friends eventually, after interning, landed Set Design positions at prestigious theatres in New York and Seattle.  One continued his Set Design studies all the way to Oxford in England.  Loved England so much he remained there many years (and where have those years gone so fast?).

Three of my other friends found living in many different places not what they really wanted, yet to remain in theatre, landed teaching set design jobs at universities, two of whom married each other.  One, the university instructor and the other working hard as a mother.  Another friend of the ten began teaching theatre scene design at a performing arts high school.

One of our ten died in a theatre shop accident.  Another we have no idea what happened to him or where he is.

And finally the last, you have been following her journey here.

Our dear Dr. Sonderling lived to the young age of 

ninety-one.  I was able to see him one final time when he was eighty-six.  He was thrilled to see me and though he was having trouble remembering people, he had no problem with knowing who I was.  

"Adelaide!  My amazing little Scene Painter who draws and paints from dark to light instead of light to dark!  And who dances with horses!"  

Sooo, assuming you have made it this far without giving up to see how Mt. Everest ended, I will keep you in suspense no longer.

I left you hanging as we were careening down Mt. Everest at high speed unaware a snow rise was built at stage left, the only way for us to go without flying into the creek at stage right.  And we had a seventy-two year old Dr. Sonderling who had been keen to join us, but by now was probably wishing he hadn't. 

In very quick succession we suddenly saw the friggin snow rise...then we reached heights no one else riding on a piece of floor vinyl with twelve people have surely ever attained before in the history of mankind. 

The guys thought we had to hit that rise doing 40mph, but it had to be at least 90mph.  We hit that sucker and we were flying waaay high.  Dr. Sonderling swore he saw a flock of birds flying below us, however I cannot attest to that.  We did pass through some clouds though.

Somehow after we returned to earth again we landed and for a brief moment it appeared our destiny was to take a plunge in the icy creek.  Though we never told Dr. Sonderling this fact, we think his weight on the stage left portion of the vinyl miraculously shifted us away from those icy waters, and most of all, sparing him from that fate because we cared so much about him.

We still kept speeding down the remainder of Mt. Everest until we at last hit a series of snowdrifts before finally coming to a stop.

All twelve of us cheered, jumped up and down and hugged each other.  Dr. Sonderling said this was the most fun he had in years!  It was indeed a thrill for us all.  The serendipitous spur of the moment events in our lives always are.  That's why we all need them.

During my visit with Dr. Sonderling when he was eighty-six, there was something else he remembered because it was one of the best moments of his life.

Dr. Sonderling asked, "Adelaide, do you remember that moment when we hit the snow rise and we became airborne so high I saw a flock of birds flying below us?"

"Oh yes, Dr. Sonderling.  If I remember correctly I believe you saw those right after we passed through all those clouds in the sky."😂💫🎭

 

Theatre Hilarity Strikes Again...

At the same theatre I described what happened during the musical version of, "Gone With The Wind," there was another hilarious event at the same theatre proving lightning can strike twice or three times or...

The following season we staged a large scale production of "The Phantom," (not to be confused with the small theatre production where our Serena's dress caught on a candelabra ripping out the back of her dress on the day she wore underpants with I 💖 SEX on them).

For THIS version of "The Phantom" a HUGE brand spanking new theatrical Fog Making Machine had been ordered to add finesse to the production. 

Oh it really added some version of finesse all right, however I am getting ahead of myself.

Joseph, in charge of the Special Effects had to visit the Fog Making Machine company where he was given extensive instructions in how to make the 

Fog Making Machine successfully work.  Which is exactly what Joseph managed to pull off with amazing finesse.  That is this finesse occurred all during rehearsals and Dress Rehearsal at least.

Did I mention yet Joseph and his wife were expecting their first child at ANY moment?

And that our contingency plan for this event to occur during our Phantom run was Joseph would have given Thomas the same excellent instructions he received?  No doubt this gave us all a sense of assurance The Fog Making Machine could have just as much success even with the baby coming.

So along comes Opening Night where if anything can go wrong in theatre it does on Opening Night.  This has been a proven fact all down through the many centuries of theatre and my career.

Three hours before the performance where everything backstage is crazy enough already, Joseph gets...THE CALL.  The one telling him, "IT'S TIME!"  So in a rush Joseph tore out of the theatre.  And in a rush Thomas prepared to run the Fog Making Machine.  Again, the rest of us took great comfort in the knowledge Joseph had taught Thomas with the same excellence in running the machine as he had been given. 

The time arrived for the-let-there-be-fog-moment to happen.  

And oh how it happened. 

For you see there was just supposed to be enough fog to cover the stage AT THE FEET OF THE CAST for the atmospheric effect.  Well this atmospheric event did not get to happen because Thomas suddenly realized at this very critical moment Joseph somehow overlooked showing him the two part step of HOW TO SHUT THE DAMN FOG MACHINE OFF!

Should my dear readers not be aware of the fact I am about to share with you, I can attest with good authority fog machines, especially brand spanking new ones are quite capable of very rapidly covering a whole stage floor with fog.

If for any reason the Fog Making Machine cannot be turned off it may then FILL the whole stage with such massive amounts of fog all the actors could be having an orgy and neither the audience nor the theatre staff in the wings would ever know this was happening.

The Fog Making Machine very soon showed us what more it was capable of doing by then filling up House Left, House Right, Center House, under the Balcony, then the entire Balcony.  Soon all of Opening Night was shrouded in thick heavy fog that kept pouring out!

From the direction of where the Fog Making Machine was located as I stood in the wings I could hear the freaking out voices of our Executive Director, Artistic Director, and Stage Manager freaking out poor Thomas even more than they were.

"Now Thomas, THINK!  Surely Joseph told you what to do and you forgot!"

"Can't someone go drag Joseph away from what he's doing?!!  This should after all take precedence over a birth!"

"Do you realize what you're saying?!!"

"Does anyone know if the Critics are here?"

"We can't even see ourselves and you're asking if WE'VE SEEN THE CRITICS?!!"

By this time I not only thought our executives voices were loud enough to now even "reach the rafters," but something came to me.

All I needed to do was follow the sound of the rising voices of our illustrious staff.

"Who's that?!!"

"Adelaide."

"It must be Adelaide because the sound of her voice is coming from the floor."

"Thomas?"

"Yes Adelaide?"

"Have you tried unplugging the machine?"

"Uh no."

"Okay, do it."

As I expected the Fog Making Machine finally was stopped.

The Executive Director started to ream Thomas out for not thinking of this when I reminded the Director he hadn't thought of it either.  Silence.

Audience members were asked to remain in their seats while all huge backstage doors were opened, all industrial size fans turned on, and all exit doors 

opened.  Soon the theatre was cleared of fog.

Dimitri, who had the Phantom role had a few words with the orchestra.  Then took center stage.

This is when he began singing what is our beloved theatre anthem of sorts, "There's No Business Like Show Business."

And there were not any dry eyes in that theatre.

Even as I write these words my heart swells with the love for what had been my profession as a Theatre Set Designer for many years, while tears pour down my cheeks.  But these tears my dear ones, are very happy ones from my heart.

Because there IS no business like show business. 

 

Oh What A Doll...

Back in 1996 I was asked to take part in a very unique project to help others.  

Serena, a psychologist had known about me for years due to the media coverage about my art and The Ride with Patches, my horse.  She had also been hearing about what an inspiring speaker I was too.

Serena was acquainted with my orthopaedic surgeon and one day called him to see if he would tell me about this self esteem project she wanted to conduct.

So I get a call from my orthopaedic surgeon.🙂

"Adelaide, a psychologist I know wanted me to see if you could take part in some kind of self esteem doll making project for women with self esteem issues, and no, not because YOU need help in this area but because she strongly feels your presence will benefit these women in ways she can't."

"A doll?!!  What kind of a doll?"🤔

"I don't know.  But knowing you and knowing how you and your friend have been successfully speaking at the Women's Prison I think you would have a huge impact.  Her name is Serena and she can explain it all to you.  By the way I think you would be a very cute little doll."🤣

So I spoke to Serena.  She felt since I attained all I did and was doing in MY body I could have an impact on the women struggling with self esteem who were insecure and unhappy because they focused on perceived things wrong with their bodies which inhibited them.  Some seriously.

The doll.  Over three days we all, Serena and I too, would be making life-size three dimensional dolls of ourselves taken from our exact measurements...head to toe.

"Uh, and then what?"🤔

"Focus on reshifting the negative self image these ladies have of themselves into positive ones.  And to help them begin to learn to accept and embrace their bodies."

Serena received a small grant to do this project.  She had to spend a large amount of the grant for the supplies and refreshments needed yet was trying to still give me a stipend for my time.  Since I happened to be free the weekend this would be I waived the stipend.  Like how many opportunities does one ever get to make a life-size doll of themselves anyway?🤣

Nine ladies in addition to Serena and I were there.  As we began to introduce ourselves all the ladies blurted out, "YOU'RE THE PATCHES LADY!"  They all had followed our story during The Ride saga and knew me as everyone did by my horse Patches' name because no one could remember my name.  I was touched.😃  

Then each of them shared their stories and reasons for being there.  One lady was struggling to overcome being bulimic; two others were overweight; one had a problem with aging; another had a problem with being too short but just simply meeting me already had a positive effect she said; one had a liver transplant a few years earlier but was struggling with how the anti-rejection drugs changed her appearance; another was struggling with how the chemo treatments she was getting had made her look; and one was just very insecure and had never felt good about herself.😪

The time came for us all to begin making a doll of ourselves.  We were asked to choose partners and immediately they all asked to be mine.  So we worked out a way for me to be a partner with each lady through the three days of the project.  

First we had to measure each other from head to toe.  Then as one lay on sheets of newsprint paper another drew their outline to make a pattern to be pinned on muslin and cut out.  By the end of our first day arms, legs, torsos, heads, hands, and feet were strewn everywhere.

The next day the sewing by hand process began by bringing all the body parts together to be filled with stuffing to make our dolls three dimensional.  As we sewed there was some very serious talk as Serena 

and I spent time individually with each lady.  They each were especially keen to know how I got to be where I was/am in accepting myself even with the constant mean ridicule I live with each day.  

I shared how my mentor friend Joseph had me make a "Dwarf Card," and the huge effect it had upon my young life.  Then striving to focus upon the positives and not the negatives by having a gratitude attitude.  

One of my many sayings they each very touchingly scrolled onto their dolls was, "We cannot get anywhere by remaining where we are.  That we have to WANT to ignite our inner spark into flames and KEEP it burning bright by not giving others or the negative part of our inner self the power to extinguish our spark."

I also gave them a list of the books which had also made a huge difference in my young life.  They all, including Serena wrote down everything I shared.  Because Serena was privately counseling the ladies I had given them ways they could begin attaining self acceptance by working together with her. 

The third day we had fully completed our dolls and dressed them with clothes we brought then placed them in chairs across from each of us.  There was a long silence.  Serena asked me first about the thoughts I had.

My very glorious inspiring first thought to share with them upon seeing my exact 3-D replica was this:

"Ohhh SHIT, Adelaide!  You really ARE a DWARF!"😂  

Yet I suddenly realized how much self acceptance I had been blessed to attain with my journey and SO grateful I could, because there had been a time in my young life when seeing my exact image in 3-D form across from me would have been horribly difficult.😖

Every lady was forced to see themselves in a whole 

new way.  Yet in a way which began a brand new journey of self acceptance and self esteem for each one of them.  Their lives were forever changed.💥

So what happened to my life-sized doll replica?  

Well after a few years she began terribly "aging" by graying and losing much of her "innards" as I did too with additional surgery for cancer, then followed by two emergency abdominal surgeries needed to keep me alive longer.  

Then when a theatre really needed my talents I moved and the poor doll got stuffed into my car trunk yet she kept scaring the hell out of people whenever I opened 

it you see.  People kept assuming the doll was a REAL human.😱

Finally, the time had come to bid my dear rapidly deteriorating doll replica goodbye before I got arrested for having a body in my trunk.  Though I had to send her remains off in these nice dignified black trash bags, 

she would always hold a very special place within my galloping journey.🤣💫

This is a photo taken of me for a art magazine piece about my life and art during the same period the Doll Project took place.

🔥How Adelaide's inner fire🔥won...

Despite all my surgeries and many long hospital stays through the decades, I continued working in between these waiting to apply for disability only when I no longer could do the work I loved after the pain became too severe even with pain medication.  I never thought when that time did finally come to file for disability it would take EIGHT years before I was approved, even with my team of renown Johns-Hopkins doctors going out of their ways to testify on my behalf!  And disability I had paid into my entire working life!🙄

Once again my boldness saved me.  And did it ever.

As a last resort I finally hired a private disability attorney to represent me.

A few months later Mr. Landers and I were asked to meet with the state Disability Hearing Board which included a very disrespectful, highly insulting doctor working for the Federal Government. 

Oh, and by the way the whole session was recorded.

This idiot had the audacity to say to me in a very mean, rude tone of voice, "What makes a midget...what makes one like YOU claim shortness is a disability?"

As Mr. Landers saw me wince he began to say, "I don't really think Adela..."

For some reason whenever I need to be very bold or to make a point, even though I am the same size standing as I am sitting I immediately stand up to my very TALL intimidating height anyway.  

Which is exactly what I did as I told Mr. Landers in a tone of voice he instantly listened to, "I'VE GOT THIS."

As my eyes shot darts of fire at the extremely rude doctor I said, "I have NEVER EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE CONSIDERED OR CLAIMED SHORTNESS ITSELF A HANDICAP AND CERTAINLY NOT A DISABILITY EITHER WHICH BY THE WAY, IF YOU HAD TAKEN THE TIME TO ACTUALLY READ MY CASE YOU WOULD KNOW."

"Now Miss..."

"I'M NOT DONE YET!  Shortness is NOT why I seek disability!  However, the severe physical problems due to DWARFISM ARE WHY I MUST!  I have fought through SEVEN spine surgeries, had to learn to walk again TWICE, have severe arachnoiditis and another insidious inflammation disease INSIDE MY SPINAL CORD I have been given a dire prognosis for with no hope of surviving when nerves to my respiratory system are destroyed like my bladder and colon are becoming.  I live with severe pain.  YET I HAVE NEVER APPLIED FOR DISABILITY UNTIL NOW, and YOU, a doctor has the audacity to insult my intelligence by implying I am saying SHORTNESS IS A DISABILITY?!!  BESIDES ADDRESSING ME BY THE EXTREMELY DEROGATORY WORD MIDGET?!!  I am constantly living with the ridicule and rudeness of so called humans just like you who chant to me, 'midget, midget, scum of the earth, slime of the sea, the lowest form of humanity,' which by the way sums up exactly who YOU have clearly shown yourself to be thank you."

I was so proud how I managed to get all that out without one single use of the F-Bomb, damn or shit.

Oh how the room was silent.  For an eternity. 

When the judge finally found his voice again he very kindly thanked my attorney and I for coming.  Said we should hear their decision in a few months.

WITHIN A FEW WEEKS Adelaide was FINALLY awarded her disability at last!👍

KA-CHING!

Mr. Landers who normally would have taken his fee at that time waived his fee.  Said I won my case, not him.  Also wanted to know if I would be interested in joining his practice to help HIM win cases.😂👍💫

He then had a very interesting piece of news he was told to tell me by a certain judge.  The very rude doctor was fired a few days after my boldness event took place.  Mr. Landers was also told the judge and staff were applauding me.  And then the judge even told him how he thought I was one hell of a little firecracker he really admired.💥🔥💥

That Little Firecracker and the fire of her boldness prevailed once again.🔥 

A very prolific Adelaide at three...

Way before I ever even got to kindergarten age I had learned a lot.  I learned swear words.  You see my parents drank, partied, fought with each other constantly.  And swore A WHOLE LOT through all of that..  

So being the VERY receptive and talented three year old child I was all of those words became MY vocabulary too.  How could they not?  I heard them constantly.  And the violence never stopped.

My babysitter Mrs. Cassity, was an older lady I loved dearly who kept children in her home during the day.  Since swear words were a regular part of my vocabulary they came out no matter where I was, but never to be mean or anything like that.  If the wood blocks castle thing I was building [future Scene Designer in the making, you see] came crashing down I would very calmly say, "Oh f**k, I'll have to do it all again."

Or, if a crayon broke [usually the black one because of all the horses I kept drawing], I would also very calmly say, "Oh SHIT, my f**king crayon just broke."  And if it was raining outside I would calmly make the important observation, "Oh damn, it's raining."  Then quite often I would tearfully share with Mrs. Cassity, "My Mommy and Daddy had a BIG f**king fight last night breaking shit and I couldn't sleep.  Please why can't I come live here?"

Unfortunately though, it turned out the other kids there were just as receptive and talented as I was, for they too began repeating all the new words they heard Adelaide saying their parents never said.  So your Adelaide at three was innocently corrupting two and three year old kids for life.

Thankfully though, dear Mrs. Cassity and all the parents of the other talented kids understood I was only repeating the words I had to live with and did not punish me, which really would have been very confusing for a three year old as to why I was being punished for words I heard all the time.🥴 

She would instead let my father have it when he came to pick me up!  Sometimes the fathers of the other talented kids like myself would let my father have it too.

By the time I was four though, Mrs. Cassity had very gently, lovingly helped me understand the words were not nice words a child should say even if my parents said them all the time.  No doubt that dear lady saved me from not only being thrown out of kindergarten later but perhaps even a life of crime too!😂
 

Robert Fulghum wrote his best selling book years ago about the important lessons of living we begin learning at the tender age of four or five.  He even included a list of what he thought his young self may have thought important.

This...is Adelaide's "version..."😃

Be nice to others.

Make friends. 
Horses are good for you.
Play.

Let others play too so they do not feel all alone.

Have fun.
And laugh.

Draw horses.
Hold hands and care.
Don't stare at others the ways I see others stare at me because it makes me cry inside my heart.
Say thank you if someone is nice wants to be your friend.
Cuss words and mean words are not very nice even if you have to hear them lots.
Big people fighting is very very scary.

Mine always fight and I don't know why.
If you are loved by a mommy and daddy it must feel good to be loved your mommy and daddy.

I know my mommy and daddy do not love me.

I do not know why.
Animals do not care what I look like.
Walk tall even if you're not tall.
Horses are good for you.

Horses do not make you cry the way people do.
Never lose wonder.

Wonder is a good thing.
Aplomb is a good thing too.
You're never too old for crayons if you draw horses.
Draw horses.
Smile at others...you will make them happy.
Gaze at the stars above.
Plunge forth and not back.
Have courage.
Love life.
Be kind. 

Be kind to horses too..
Give hugs.

Please give Adelaide hugs too.
Dance.
Love music.
Horses are good for you.

Horses are always good for you.

Adelaide loves you.

Oh, Those If Only's...

We all have them...the what I call, "the if only's."  "If only's," are wrapped up with sadness, regret, fear, and a kind of envy.  "If only I hadn't said..."  "If only I had done..."  "If only I was smarter..."  "If only I were more bold..."  "If only I had a different nose, butt, body, boobs, was taller, shorter, skinnier, handsome, pretty."

When I was still doing speaking engagements everywhere, people would come up to me afterwards expressing how much better their lives would be "if only" they could be more, and I'm not kidding, like...ME, then they would be happier.  Obviously not the Little Person part but my inner strength, attitude, boldness, aplomb traits they so admired.  

What I reminded them of though, is my lifetime of severe challenges carved me into the person before them.  How through my journey I was determined to plunge forth by learning from my experiences and not be defeated by them, just as they also had the same determination within.  All they had to do was ignite it, fan the flames, and refocus those "if only's."  And sometimes they may plunge backwards but they had to be determined to keep going no matter what. 

You see the problem with losing ourselves in the "if only's" is we spin our wheels and don't get anywhere.  We spend so much time focused on what is behind us we are mired down in the feelings the "if only's" instill within our present, like fear, insecurity, regret, etc.  

The only way we can plunge forth out of the muck is by embracing possibility...even daring to believe we can and will rise above the muck.  By learning from our if only's we can see what we need to change...to want to refocus on.  Tennyson said, "To strive, to seek, and not to yield."  To go forth and conquer.

So, how do we change our "if only's?"  By using two other words..."even though."  The "even though" words are similar to but different with the same kind of impact as my powerful two little words, "and yet," I wrote about recently.

You see, what these words of mine I am sharing with you do is shift the negative into a positive one with hope.  For instance, "If only I had self esteem," changes to, "Even though I feel I lack self esteem now I will keep believing in myself, loving myself, acknowledging I have what it takes within to rise above insecurity, because I do."  

Or, "If only I had taken that promotion," changes to, "Even though I feel like I failed by not taking that promotion, the next time I will and succeed."  See the shift in changing "if only" into a positive one of hope?  And the more we do this, the more it changes us from within.

One year I had speaking engagements for several women's groups at different locations.  I began noticing no matter which group I spoke was a lady who kept coming wherever I was speaking.  Afterwards each time a bunch of women would always come up to me to comment or ask questions.  When this happened the lady would hover nearby listening.  Though I tried to include her, she preferred to hover.  Then I didn't see her again.

That is until nearly a year had passed.  Once again there she was at a place where I was speaking.  Only this time she was determined to speak to me.  I noticed her demeanor had somehow changed.  She told me how my "and yets," "if only's," and "even though's," had completely changed her.  The lady literally embraced her "if only's" and was living a life paralyzed by them.  Slowly the shift in refocusing she heard me say began happening from within, to the point she became a happier, different person living a far more full life.

Arise, go forth, and conquer, my dear ones.🐎😃🐎

Because...

You get more than you give when you give more than you get.