Though my family did not go to church, from early childhood on, I believed in God and treasure a loving God as I believe Him to be.
At age nineteen I began going to a dear church in the country, and was baptized. It really was a very profound experience...but...BUT...sometimes the most hilarious unexpected things can happen to me. Remember this...I am very buoyant in water.
I had become close friends with the pastor and his family, for we were the same age, and in school with many expenses. Often on Sunday nights I would join them for fried egg and ketchup sandwiches while we shared hopes, tears, laughter, and dreams.
Several others were being baptized the same day I was, with a packed church. This was a full immersion baptism, so the water was 3' deep. I LOVE WATER. Oceans, swimming pools, lakes, creeks, I am in!
The church had just gotten new white baptism robes...mine being 7" longer than me. And did I say I am very buoyant in water?
I was last. I gathered as much of the excess robe in my hand as I could and stepped in...before the packed church watching, including my dear friend Jackie, who could laugh loud...really loud.
When I reached bottom the water quickly made me pop up like a cork, as a HUGE expanse of white material began rising to the top.
By this time I was floating and trying to look in control at the same time. Ron could immediately see we were rapidly losing control...both in the water, and trying not to laugh. Nevertheless, we had to continue. He managed to guide me over to him, and asked the right questions I responded to, and then...AND THEN...came the moment to dip my head beneath the water by laying me backwards...not good. Remember I am very buoyant now with a HUGE expanse of white robe?
Ron laid me back and before he could react my legs went flying out of the water straight up in the air. By the way, I should say I thankfully did have a bathing suit on.
He first had to raise my head back up, then quickly managed to put my legs back down, but white robe material was everywhere floating and I had to grab onto him to keep from popping out again.
So much for being in control. We lost it.
Just as Ron and I thought we were getting some semblance of control and dignity, we could first hear Jackie trying to stifle her unique loud laugh, followed by others who were losing it. Then WE began losing it. And this was a baptism! I could only hope God was enjoying this. He had to be falling over laughing up there.
As Ron kept me from popping out of the water, he carefully pushed me to the other side to get out. It didn't end there though. Remember the expanse of robe? As I was climbing out and reached the step before the top, part of the robe got caught on a nail sticking out and I got stuck. So as poor Ron was trying to seriously speak to the congregation, out of the corner of his eye he could see I was stuck....good and stuck. Not only that, he could tell I was totally dissolved in laughter.
Jackie said they could tell something else crazy had happened.
Bless his heart though, somehow he was able to quickly wrap up what he was saying. Only he couldn't exit my way because I was still partly in the water and stuck on a nail. He had to go the other way then hurry around to help me get out, but it was difficult you see. We were both in hysterics. And he still had to deliver a sermon!
We finally got me out and he went on his way. With all that wet robe I somehow made it to the change area. I realized it was best not to join Jackie and the congregation, until after the service. With good reason. Everyone would have lost all control, bursting into laughter.
That had to be the funniest baptism in history. Jackie said it could only happen to me.
Ohhh, yes!
Decades later I heard they were still laughing about that baptism.
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