Back in 1996 I was asked to take part in a very unique project to help others. Serena, a psychologist, had known about me for years, due to the media coverage about my art and The Ride with Patches, my horse. She had also been hearing about what an inspiring speaker I was too.
Serena was acquainted with my orthopaedic surgeon and one day called him to see if he would tell me about this self esteem project she wanted to conduct.
So I get a call from my orthopaedic surgeon.🙂
"Adelaide, a psychologist I know wanted me to see if you could take part in some kind of self esteem doll making project for women with self esteem issues, and no, not because YOU need help in this area, but because she strongly feels your presence will benefit these women in ways she can't."
"A doll?!! What kind of a doll?"🤔
"I don't know. But knowing you, and knowing how you
and your friend have been successfully speaking at the Women's Prison, I think you would have a huge impact. Her name is Serena, and she can explain it all to you. By the way, I think you'd be a cute little doll."🤣
So I spoke to Serena. She felt since I attained all I did and was doing in MY body, I could have an impact on the women struggling with self esteem, who were insecure and unhappy, because they focused on perceived things wrong with their bodies which inhibited them. Some seriously.
The doll. Over three days we all, Serena and I too, would be making life-size three dimensional dolls of ourselves taken from our exact measurements...head to toe.
"Uh, and then what?"🤔
"Focus on reshifting the negative self image these ladies have of themselves into positive ones. And to help them begin to learn to accept and embrace their bodies."
Serena received a small grant to do this project. She had to spend a large amount of the grant for the supplies and refreshments needed, yet was trying to still give me a stipend for my time. Since I happened to be free the weekend this would be, I waived the stipend. Like how many opportunities does one get in a lifetime to make a life-size doll of themselves anyway?🤣
Nine ladies in addition to Serena and I were there. As we began to introduce ourselves, all the ladies blurted out, "YOU'RE THE PATCHES LADY!" They all had followed our story during The Ride saga, and knew me as everyone did, by my horse Patches' name because no one could remember my name. I was touched. I then briefly told them the rest. Now THEY were touched.😃
Then each of them shared their stories and reasons for being there. One lady was struggling to overcome being bulimic; two others were overweight; one had a problem with aging; another had a problem with being too short but just meeting ME already had a positive effect she said; one had a liver transplant a few years earlier but was struggling with how the anti-rejection drugs changed her appearance; another was struggling with how the chemo treatments she was getting had made her look; and one was just very insecure and had never felt good about herself.😪
The time came for us all to begin making a doll of ourselves. We were asked to choose partners, and immediately they all asked to be mine. So we worked out a way for me to be a partner with each lady through the three days of the project.
First we had to measure each other from head to toe. Then as one lay on sheets of newsprint paper, another drew their outline to make a pattern to be pinned on muslin and cut out. By the end of our first day, arms, legs, torsos, heads, hands, and feet were strewn everywhere.
The next day the sewing by hand process began bringing the body parts together. As we sewed, there was serious talk, as Serena and I spent time individually with each lady. They all were especially keen to know how I got where I was, as in accepting myself even with the mean ridicule I lived with. I shared how my friend Joseph had me make a "Dwarf Card," and the huge affect it had upon my young life. Then focusing upon the positives; not the negatives. Having a gratitude attitude. I also gave them
a list of the books which had also made a difference in
my young life. They all, including Serena, wrote down much of what I shared. Since Serena was privately counseling the ladies, I had given them ways they
could attain self acceptance by working together
with her.
The third day we had fully completed our dolls and dressed them with clothes we brought. Then placed them in chairs across from each of us. There was a long silence. Serena asked me first about the thoughts I had.
My first thought I told them, was "Oh my, I REALLY am a DWARF!" I realized just how much self acceptance I had been blessed to attain along my journey and grateful I did, because there had been a time in my young life when seeing my exact image in 3-D form across from me would have been painfully difficult.😖
Every lady was forced to see themselves in a whole new way. Yet in a way which kick started a new journey of self acceptance and self esteem for each of them.💥
So what happened to my life-sized doll replica? After a few years she began "aging" by graying and losing her "innards" as I did too when I had surgery for cancer and abdominal surgeries. Then I moved and the doll was in
my car trunk and scared the hell out of people whenever
I opened it, who actually thought the doll was a real human until I showed them it wasn't.😱
Finally, it was time to bid my doll replica goodbye before I got arrested for having a body in my trunk...so I sent her off in a very nice black trash bag.🤣💫
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